Welcome, my fellow countrymen.
Bear with me.
Ever since Yuan Shih-kai was overthrown by the National Army...
... and his reign of less than a 100 days came to an end...
... his former minions continue to ravage the country.
But our hard days will soon be over.
Our General Bully Lei loves his soldiers.
If you all are willing to join Lei's army...
... I, Liu Kun-shan, the Chief of Staff...
... dare promise you...
... food, money and fortune will all be yours.
What's that?
Buns! It's buns!
It's silver!
They've gone crazy.
Liu Kun-shan...
... you trick these farmers with unorthodox magic!
Captain Tsai, how dare you slander your superior?
I'm just speaking the truth.
Personal covert military recruitment is illegal.
Put a curse on me if you're really capable.
Prepare the execution apparatus!
Do you know what this is?
This is the most notorious and infamous weapon...
... specially made during the Qing dynasty...
... which can behead enemies from miles away...
... the flying guillotine.
It's the flying guillotine!
Captain Tsai...
... I'll kill you with this legendary device today.
Lei's army value discipline.
Will you join us?
I will!
Me, too!
Good, Butler Liu.
You've recruited 5,000 soldiers within 3 months.
You're no doubt a genius.
General...
... I just used a few tricks.
It's all due to your great name that convinced the farmers.
Recruitment is no doubt important and trickery is to be expected.
However...
... don't let me bear the reputation of a superstition monger.
Yes, sir.
5,000 more soldiers means 5,000 more mouths to feed.
Just food alone will cost a lot.
Where do I find money to buy more guns?
General, please do not back down.
All the warlords are fighting now.
If we don't gather enough forces...
... we'll be overrun soon.
I never cared about money.
But now...
... I understand I can't do anything without it.
Let's think of a way to ask those merchants for more.
I've celebrated my lunar, solar birthdays...
... and even my wedding anniversaries with my wives.
What else can I use this time?
General...
... there's a general in a certain province...
... who taxes the farmers on their livestock.
Why don't we try it?
In that case, should I pay tax for you in the name of dogs?
Kun-shan, I'm just teasing you.
If I even tax the farmers, then I'm really a beast.
Report, General!
The ceremony is about to begin.
Master... Master...
Today's party is a grand occasion and a solemn event.
Behave yourselves while you're out there.
You sluts have no manners. Stand back, all of you.
Let go.
Honey...
You look really handsome and heroic in this uniform today.
It's very impressive!
Good. Stand behind me too.
I refuse.
I want to show the world that I, your 3rd wife, am your favorite.
One, two, three, four, five, six...
... where's Madam 7th?
She's doesn't know what's good for her. Forget about her.
The General is here. Please applause.
Tangerine and Peach, how are you?
Aren't Apricot and Melon Seed here?
Ladies and gentlemen...
... I'm pleased to announce that Taga Culture Group...
... and General Lei have co-founded Kanwa Films...
... and is officially established today!
We value this important collaboration...
... and we'll send a team of advisers soon...
... to assist General Lei with his venture.
Kun-shan.
Why did he wink at me?
It means he wants you to read between the lines.
He sounds like he's talking about movies, but he's implying...
... military support.
Why beat around the bush?
It's called diplomacy.
What is this thing?
A projector.
I prepared a short film today...
... so everyone can experience the magic of film!
Double Agent
- Starring: Liu Kun-shan - You're the lead actor?
Director: Tarou Mitearai
Urgent: Lei's Army Is Expanding
He used to be my assistant.
But I discovered that he actually is a spy from our enemies.
He's even trying to expose our recruiting activities.
What does this mean?
I used western hypnotism to control him.
Nonsense!
Really?
If you believe it, then it's real.
Isn't that Tangerine and Peach?
They're Taga Group's new action stars.
Wonderful!
Film is an illusion.
It's not real. Don't be fooled!
I know. Those money are fake too!
No, we used real money.
I increased the budget for better effects.
Filmmaking is expensive.
To Be Continued
Bravo!
Movie reflects life and vice versa.
Fascinating! Fascinating! Bravo!
I have one more announcement.
Our company will soon produce a romance film.
I now need a female lead.
- Let me do it! - Let me!
Give me!
- Give you what? - The leading role.
On what ground?
On the ground that I'm your woman.
Good answer, it's yours.
If you hurt yourself again, you may never lead troops again.
- You dare to curse me? - I dare not, I dare not.
- Sir, please take it with you. - Enough, you talk too much.
My 7th wife, it's me, your babe.
I've not seen you in weeks. I miss you!
The Phoenix's Fly I used last time not only didn't work...
... I even sprained my back.
I'll attack with my Crossed Fist this time.
Prepare for your doomsday tonight.
Here I come.
So ruthless.
You want to kill your husband?
When did I went though the marriage ceremony with you?
Ceremony is a small matter.
My love for you is what counts, my 7th wife.
I hate people calling me the 7th wife.
Okay, you hate being the last?
I'll get rid of the rest and make you the eldest.
Your cat face is disgusting.
I'm obviously a bull, not a cat.
Liu Yin, I'm feeling horny.
My body seems to be telling me...
... it's time to have a baby.
Won't you help me, please?
It hurts.
Catch it!
Smells good!
Yin, I've come to ask you.
What is this thing called free love?
You took all your women by force, forget it.
Don't believe the rumours.
My 1st wife was an arranged marriage.
Wives two, three, four and five offered themselves to me.
So you have to take them all?
It would have been rude to say no.
When will you let me go?
I must find my father.
Forget him.
Once you find him, you'll never come back.
How will I ever find you again?
Rotten warlord!
Yin, just stay here.
If you're bored, I can take you to magic shows.
Or we can try to date...
... and continue to cultivate affections for each other.
Don't come to me again until you find my father.
Father-in-law, once you appear, I can marry her.
Where on earth are you?
Liu Wan-yao...
... you made your name by performing the 7 Wonders for Her Majesty.
But you defied an edict to stop the riots with your magic.
You think you could escape me by changing your name?
Stop wasting my time! Where is the scroll?
I don't know.
You can make it appear if you didn't knew?
I won't say even if I knew.
Do you know what tortures await you?
Severed tendons, broken kneecaps...
... amputated fingers, severed tongue...
... castration.
Devil, your parlour tricks won't work on me.
Let's see.
I'll use the drilling technique against you then.
Everything is an illusion, a dream.
When I wake up, everything will be fine.
Self-hypnosis?
I'll play along!
Father...
... I'm your daughter, Liu Yin.
They're pricking me with needles.
Burning me with fire, cutting me with knives.
I hurt terribly!
Quickly come save me.
I'm sorry, my dear daughter.
Father can't help you.
Where is the scroll?
Don't force me! I'll kill you!
You won't until you get the 7 Wonders.
♪ The rhythm of my clappers is slow ♪
♪ As people rush to and fro ♪
♪ Warlords fight in endless war ♪
♪ Coins don't have value anymore ♪
♪ It costs me eight catties ♪
♪ To buy two noodle patties ♪
♪ Grandpa ♪
♪ Don't bother with these affairs ♪
♪ Just sing our songs ♪
♪ Ply our arts for our livelihood ♪
♪ This place has so much to give ♪
♪ Come and see ♪
♪ Storytelling, singing, kung fu fighting ♪
♪ Donkey, and picture shows ♪
♪ All kind of entertainment ♪
♪ Illusions are sights to behold ♪
♪ Enchanting both young and old ♪
♪ Behind each performer ♪
♪ A trick with flair ♪
♪ Fish bowls, braziers appear out of thin air ♪
♪ Each performer has talent to spare ♪
♪ To name the best would be unfair ♪
Brother, stop worrying.
There are so many talents around.
If only we could find one...
... our business will definitely improve.
That's easier said than done.
Lucky Wind Tavern books all the best acts.
I think we won't survive another half a month at this rate!
Attention, everyone! Ladies and gentlemen!
Come see the show!
If anyone can replicate our Magic Walnut trick...
... we'll give you 50 silver dollars!
Now, please welcome our big boss, Master Chen...
... for a personal demonstration of this magic!
- Thank you. - Bravo...
Everyone, watch closely.
I figured it out. I can win this challenge.
Don't embarrass yourself, stay here!
- Who wants to try? - Give it a try!
Don't be afraid.
May I try?
Welcome, welcome.
Come and show me, sir.
- Hi. - Hi.
Please.
Look, there's water in the bowl! There's water!
How naughty of the pigeon.
Pigeon droppings!
Hey, he solved your trick! Pay him now!
- Pay up! - Quiet!
Be reasonable.
He hasn't got the walnut yet, right?
That's right, that's right!
Bring back the walnut and convince him!
Right?
Be patient, everyone!
The walnuts are on Master Chen.
Impressive... impressive.
- Pay up! - Pay up!
Okay, okay...
Please accept this.
I've offended you, a reward is unnecessary.
That's too kind of you.
May I ask you name? Where did you learn it?
I'm Chang Hsien.
I'm self-taught for fun.
Bravo!
Rickshaw!
- Brother, don't let him leave! - Right, he can save our business!
Boss, why don't we hire him?
Wait, Mr. Chang! I've a favour to ask!
What's wrong with you
Mr. Chang...
Master Chang!
Ignore that man!
A ghost!
Closed For Renovation
Good shot with the droppings.
Now everyone thinks Chang Hsien is a freak.
Where is he?
Put more air holes in the seat. I nearly suffocate.
Okay, I'll fix it right away!
- Help yourself to the fresh buns. - Thank you.
Li Yi...
... so that pair of siblings own Happy Inn?
Yes.
They seem honest enough.
♪ Master scholar and strategist ♪
♪ Zhuge Kongming was a genius ♪
♪ He masterminded military campaigns ♪
Dear Madams!
Butler Liu, good day!
Where is Madam 7th?
She's tired of your shows ages ago.
Chen Kuo, got something new?
I'm working on it.
Once I'm ready, I'll present it to all you madams.
Madam 7th isn't interested in anything but the magic show.
If she isn't pleased, the General will blame us.
Master spoils that vixen.
Well said!
Master is so bias, isn't he?
Definitely!
That's enough.
Let's not discuss this in public in front of an outsider.
What did you find out?
I sent investigators to Hunan...
... only to discover that the person is a charlatan.
It seems the 7 Wonders is fake. It's untrustworthy.
But it's historically documented. How can it be wrong?
Yes... yes.
Here's your fee.
Take it.
Butler Liu is warning you...
... accomplish this mission or suffer the consequences.
It's stolen from a tomb.
My dear workers...
... if I really had a choice, I won't need to close down the shop.
Farewell.
- Let's go. - Let's go.
Please take care.
Brother, if we had hired Chang Hsien that day...
... we wouldn't be in such dire straits now.
Even the heavens won't help me.
Mr. Li.
Mr. Chang?
What brings you here?
I wish to buy half of your shares...
... so you can keep this place running.
What do you think?
My brother is always speechless to important matters.
He's overwhelmed by your proposition!
But you're too late.
He has already sold out to Chen Kuo and took his downpayment.
Return him the money.
Will this be enough?
Yes!
Yes! More than enough! I'll ask the staff to return!
No need.
I have men.
Go!
According to our contract...
... I'm paying back three times your deposit.
But didn't you say you're quitting?
Chang Hsien has returned from overseas!
The great magician will perform at Happy Inn!
The great magician?
They have arrived.
You two have questions?
What exactly are you planning?
You must have an ulterior motive, right?
You, stop asking! You, don't tell me!
I'm not listening!
As long as our family business survives...
... I'll pretend I don't know.
Indeed.
Some things are better left unanswered.
You all say Warlord Chang will decimate us...
... but I'm more worried about General Li.
General Li's army is larger and closer to us.
If he decides to ambush us, we're dead.
If Li dares to attack...
... I'll deploy 3,000 elite soldiers to the frontlines!
Fight with him!
I'll send 8,000 men! All armed with Mauser pistols!
Hei, forget your useless Mauser pistols.
I'll dispatch 10,000 troops with 200 Vickers heavy machine guns.
He'll be dead for sure!
Vickers guns are heavy and clumsy!
Listen, I've just bought 500 lightweight Maxim machine guns.
When you fire, it goes bang-bang!
It's so exciting!
Fatso, you left a soldier on my territory!
Take it back!
This land was originally mine! You want to seize it?
Don't put on airs, you small officer!
Everyone knows you used to smuggle salt!
Salt-smuggler, pull back your troops or I'll...
... I'll show you my force!
It was originally Master's territory. Just retreat your soldiers.
He's right, why offend Master over a few acres of land?
Have you no shame?
Damn! I thought we're on the same side?
Don't yell at me!
I can turn my guns on you!
I'll ask one last time...
... will you retreat?
No, I refuse! What can you do to me?
He refuses?
I'll gouge out your other eyeball if you refuse!
Stop it! What's wrong with you two?
Go ahead. Kill each other.
Then I can take your territories without any effort.
Do you really mean it?
I, Bully Lei isn't a backstabber.
If I'd wanted your territories...
... I would have challenged you directly.
I'm not the sneaky type.
If you have a problem over territory, just speak out.
There will be no quarrels if the borders are clearly demarcated.
Besides, the public sees us as a bunch of amateurs.
If we don't stick together, how will we beat them?
Brother Bully is right.
Take a look, brothers.
I have tanks...
... to blast my enemies into smithereens!
Damn! You have got all the latest weapons from Japan.
- What do we fight them with? - Fine.
Give me a list of what you need.
I'll give you...
... what I can.
Damn it! Brother Bully is really a worthy friend!
Learn from it!
He's a man worthy of being our leader!
- Yes, leader! - Hurray!
Mitearai san, are you really giving him our tanks?
Yes.
Bully Lei is a fool. Why support him?
A fool can be easily manipulated.
The Northeastern warlords are too smart.
We must hedge our bets.
But...
Don't worry. I've planted someone.
No wonder...
One, two, three!
Friends and neighbors...
... to celebrate our re-opening...
... today's shows are free!
Line up for tickets!
Don't push! Line up for tickets!
Make way, make way!
Boss, we're here.
- This way, please - Where's your ticket?
What is it? Didn't you say the show was free?
- Yes, but you still need a ticket. - That's right.
Give him two dollars.
One will do.
- Will it do now? - Please.
This is the westerners' legendary carnival mirror?
I must buy one too
Ladies and gentlemen...
... famed for his exploits at Lucky Wind Tavern after winning Chen Kuo...
... Master Chang Hsien!
Do you take us for children?
It can only fool children.
Let's go.
Master Chen... please stay.
Yes, Master Chang?
Fire...
... is a gift from the heavens.
It can cook...
... so that mankind no longer eat raw meat.
It can also refine metal from ore...
... for our use.
Ever since we discovered fire...
... the fate of mankind...
... has changed.
Civilization...
... was thus born.
Could this be the legendary Cold Fire?
Fire can keep us warm...
... but it's also fearful.
Do you know...
... what happens when fire falls into the hands of a magician?
I can use fire to create spectacles...
... or use it to show my fury.
Bravo!
Te-chun.
Let's modify it here.
Put it away.
Bully Lei's aide has brought his soldiers.
The big fish is about to take the bait.
Mr. Chang!
How did I perform so far?
Not bad.
Then can I officially be your assistant?
Of course.
It's really great.
Let's take a walk over there.
Sure.
Tickets are all sold out these few days. We'll be busy.
Rest up for the show tomorrow.
The General wants to see the magic show.
Block all roads tomorrow morning.
Yes!
Rehearsal starts.
Excuse me.
What is that?
Bully Lei.
Can a dummy react? Get a real man.
Yes... who?
You then.
Fine.
Come on.
The smoke can only last a minute.
Then the guards will realise Bully Lei has disappeared.
Go!
Will you all be this gentle to Bully Lei?
You... seriously?
Move on.
Hurry up.
One, two, three!
Go!
One, two, three!
- How long did we take? - Over two minutes.
It's not really far off the mark.
We can't afford any mistakes when we kidnap Bully Lei.
One person's mistake will be fatal to the others.
Let's practise again.
Brother!
Why are you sneaking about?
Don't run!
- Don't move! - Don't move!
Stay!
Everyone...
... you were just practising your new act, right?
Time to tell you the truth.
Don't say it, don't say it! Cover your ears now!
Don't worry. They're not a threat.
Right!
He hasn't said it yet. We haven't heard it yet.
So let's just pretend nothing has happened.
But you saw everything.
- Grab them! - Stop!
- Stay! - Stop!
What do you want?
Do you know you're endangering all of us?
You only care about yourself.
How different are you from those scums warlords?
We think of the greater good.
What is the greater good? Human lives are the greater good!
If you're going to hurt them, I'll quit immediately.
If something goes wrong, I'll hold you responsible.
Actually...
... I've always wanted to join... whatever...
... to overthrow... whatever...
Don't worry!
My brother won't have the guts to say you all did "whatever".
You...
Did we come for a magic show or an execution?
You'll be shot first!
Tease me all you want.
We're only here to make up the numbers.
She has Master wrapped around her fingers.
What else can we do but to amuse ourselves?
Right, do we have a choice?
Then go fight with her.
A female street-juggler is no match for me.
Why are you all hiding here? Huh?
Oh, it's the orchestra.
What is it?
Madam, I'll help you up.
Bully... help me.
Your feet are too big for high heels.
Get up now.
Excuse me... excuse me.
Sir, the President has summoned a war council meeting.
I'm not going today.
The President is a powerful man. We can't offend him.
Shut up.
- Sit. - How can you ignore state affairs?
If you skip the meeting, I'm not watching the show either.
Then I'll miss your smile.
- I'm leaving. - Okay... okay.
Then just one smile for me.
So adorable!
Go now.
Get up now.
Change the program.
The girl and the scholar were a happy couple.
What went wrong?
The scholar should be the girl's lover.
The old man is her father.
The man with the gun is the bully.
While the scholar went abroad, the bully kidnapped her.
Her father went missing too.
The girl lives on in sorrow.
I feel so sorry for them.
- Look. - How come she's crying?
Where? Let me see.
Wow, real tears!
She never forgets her lover, so she cries.
Madam...
... can I borrow your handkerchief?
You don't seemed to be moved.
Don't you want them to reunite?
Can they reunite?
Magic...
... aims to create miracles.
I wish for miracles too.
But after waiting too long, a person starts having doubts.
Just have faith.
Your dreams...
... will come true.
She's smiling!
It's a happy reunion! It's a happy reunion!
The Back Hallway
Return to the mansion.
He just celebrated his birthday last month.
It's another birthday so quickly.
Today is their dog's birthday.
You mean Butler Liu?
It's just another excuse to swindle our money.
- General, congratulations. - Congratulations.
Madam, please accept our token of appreciation.
General, what is this thing?
A tigerdog.
It's a cross breed between a tiger and a dog.
- Such a rarity! - Yeah!
Bully... let's dance!
May I?
Master!
- I'll step on you. - Go ahead.
Hey, what are you doing?
It's Master Chang.
You don't want to see me?
I've waited three years for you. All I get is a note?
I returned once I heard what happened to you.
It's been nine months.
These walls can't hold you.
Why didn't you escape?
He's looking for me.
You seem concerned about him.
If you prefer him, just tell me.
What are you suspecting?
- I think he's not your type of man. - That's for me to decide.
You suspecting me is another matter.
A person who's ruthless and evil but yet is accommodating to me.
Do you think he's a bad person?
A good person went to Europe and vanished without trace.
He even forgot about his wedding.
Do you consider him a good man?
It's been three years.
We now meet again...
... yet you said nothing nice to me.
Do you still have me in your heart?
I came back to fulfil my promise.
I personally wrote the guest list.
I don't think you're on it.
Who are you?
Chang Hsien?
Bully, he's the great magician, Chang Hsien!
Master Chang is here! Come greet him!
Mr. Chang, I'd love to see your show again tomorrow!
Mr. Chang, what brings you here?
- Actually, I invited him. - You did?
You took me to his show last time.
I was quite impressed.
So I asked him to come celebrate our tigerdog's birthday.
Why didn't you say so?
You haven't given me a chance to speak, General.
Mr. Chang...
... the guests are all waiting for your performance.
- So beautiful! - Let me see!
What about me? What about me?
I want one too! I want one too!
Gorgeous!
I'm the eldest wife! I want something better!
It's great!
Beautiful!
What about mine?
Master Chang, what about me? What do you have for me?
They say a magician is nothing without props.
General, can I borrow your gun?
No.
What are you afraid of?
Take it.
- There's one bullet left. - You're very observant, General.
The last bullet...
... is my gift to you.
Hold your fire! Don't move!
General Lei and his 7th wife are truly a perfect couple.
Bully, this is what foreigners call "romantic".
Master Chang, shoot at us too!
You're really impressive. I must go visit you one day.
I look forward to it.
Stop! We're here!
Careful, careful! It's hot.
Careful... careful...
Listen, let's go buy some candy, shall we? Go that way.
Aide, which end is the front?
General, the other end!
This end looks better. Next time, we drive in reverse.
- The General is buying candy! - Yes!
Hands off! Pay for it money first!
Come... Aide!
Yes!
Tell me what an aide is responsible for?
He needs to pay, sir!
- You're getting smarter. - Yes, sir!
I'm complementing you. What "Yes, sir"?
Say "Thank you, sir".
Yes, sir!
Idiot.
Do you want to watch a magic show?
- Yes! - Yes!
Bully Lei is here!
Choose a seat and sit down!
He's offering himself.
Use this opportunity to kidnap him immediately!
No.
Too many children.
You want me to give up such a good opportunity?
He still has my woman.
I have no interest in your love affairs.
I'm a man with a cause!
You never did anything for yourself or your family?
I'm warning you...
... no moves until I say so.
Hurry up, hurry up!
Buy us some time. Standby for the performance.
We can't wait!
Please sit, General.
Fat boy, get lost!
General, please.
Be nice, kid.
Kids, take a seat! The magic show is about to start!
General, distinguished guests...
... today's show will delight both young and old!
Hear that? You're all distinguished guests.
Quiet, quiet! Watch the performance!
Please sit, General.
I'm scared...
My dear, don't cry. It's fake.
Oops, not this! Cover your eyes!
It's okay to look now.
It isn't hot.
Do you like it?
Ready.
His guards are behind. We can't act without the smoke.
Ignore him. Wait for my signal.
- Don't be nervous. - Stop it!
General, there's fire!
I'm scared...
Ready.
So annoying.
It's all right, don't be scared. It's okay.
Hit it!
Abracadabra!
Trap door.
- What are you looking for? - My friend has disappeared.
Disappeared?
Did you enjoy my magic?
Let's perform together, okay?
Go out.
Be good.
A trapdoor and tunnel under the seat.
That's how you made the kid disappear.
General is very sharp indeed.
If I were sitting there...
... then you could have kidnapped me.
That's right.
Why didn't I think of that?
General should be worth a fortune.
I think I know who you are.
You're a trickster!
That day, with just a few tricks, you kept all the people amused.
- Aren't you a trickster? - You're wrong, I'm a dreammaker.
Dreammaker?
A better word for fraudster.
Even so, it takes study and practice to deceive.
General...
- Stay back. - General, tell me what you want.
Teach me a few magic tricks to make my 7th wife smile.
I see.
- But it's quite difficult. - Why?
Madam 7th seems to be troubled.
You can read minds too? You even know this kind of thing?
In our line of work, we must be observant.
I just want to make her smile.
It shouldn't be too difficult for you, right?
To make a woman smile, sometimes you need to tell a friendly lie.
Do you know what I mean?
Friendly lie?
All right, I'll teach you a simple trick first.
- See if you can please her. - Okay, okay.
Pay attention.
I've shown you the technique.
But I can't guarantee love. It all depends on you.
Of course! I'll make it work!
- Master. - Where is Madam 7th?
Over there.
Yin, don't hit me first. Please be my good audience.
Cigarette.
Turn around.
My side.
Forget it. I saw this trick when I was a month old.
I'm not done yet.
- Who taught you this? - Who else but Master Chang?
He's quite charming. We get on quite well.
What did you talk about?
Nothing much.
I told him he kept the ladies amused with just a few tricks...
... so he must be a trickster.
He denied it. I said, "You're still a fraudster."
He said even so, it takes study and practice to deceive...
... and asked if I understood. In fact, I don't quite understand.
He asked me why I approached him.
I said I wanted to learn a trick to make you smile.
But he said you looked troubled. I said, "You can read minds, too?"
He said a magician must be observant.
Then he taught me a trick to see how you react.
Give me the ring.
Yin, what must I do to make you happy?
Who are you? A thief!
Who are you?
Stop!
- Come down. - Come down.
Move aside!
If you'd wanted to return the ring to me, you could do it yourself.
I just wanted you to know...
... I always carry it with me.
You should know I came back for you.
It's dangerous approaching Bully Lei.
- You still care for me - What do you want?
I want you to come with me.
How can I leave before I find my father?
Master Liu is imprisoned...
... along with their comrades.
We are the action team from the North.
We know Bully Lei often takes you to magic shows...
... so we asked Mr. Chang to collaborate with us.
You want to use me as bait to capture Lei as a hostage to swap prisoners?
Yes.
- What if he refuses? - Kill him.
Killing him will put my father's life in danger.
Miss Liu, your father's life is a small matter.
But Lei collaborating with foreign powers is a big matter!
- I surely won't help you. - Mr. Chang...
... which side do you think she's on now?
Let me talk to her in private.
I just want to know whether I'm wrong to return this time?
If out of jealousy, then you're wrong.
- Stop her, tie her up! - Hold it!
Li Yi, give me some time.
Ready!
Action!
Satou-san said...
... he traveled from Japan to China...
... and fell in love with me...
... at first sight.
Am I truly...
... that beautiful?
Cut! Change scene.
Bully!
You've come to visit me!
How did I do?
You're normally a good speaker...
... but why are you out of breath when delivering your lines?
This is how all leading ladies act! I must change costumes now!
Please sign.
Kun-shan, what does it say?
This is an "Acknowledgement of Arms Delivery" document.
Aren't the weapons gifts to me?
This is international protocol.
Otherwise, Mitea-san can't account to his superiors.
Actually, this is like a receipt for accounting purposes.
Oh, for accounting...
Then what's this?
This is a "Declaration of Loyalty to the Qing Dynasty" document.
Didn't we cut off our pigtails long ago?
Actually, the people miss the good old days.
Our country is powerful because we have an Emperor.
Mitea-san, do I look like an Emperor, huh?
If I were the Emperor...
... I'd gather all the red light district beauties as my own harem!
Indulging in my own pleasure palace.
How nice would that be!
General, why don't I read your fortune?
This is called "Dragon with Regrets."
It means you have the power to rise.
However...
... there's danger ahead.
What danger is it?
The danger is your dragon cannot soar too high.
Otherwise, he may fall to death.
Therefore, accept your destiny.
Yes, the General should support the Emperor.
Well...
Action!
Excuse me.
A bath?
Please, stop it!
Son of a gun!
What are you doing?
How dare you touch my woman!
I won't allow my woman to shoot sex films.
Change the script!
He's not going to cooperate with us!
What did he say?
Report, General! The director appears to be saying...
... the storyline demands that Mrs. Lei bares it all.
I'm paying for the film.
You have to change if I say so.
Let's just kill this jerk!
What did he say?
The director should be saying that even if you're the investor...
... you can't change the script.
Absolutely ridiculous!
If you don't change it, I'll kill you immediately!
- Please calm down, General Lei! - Let's talk it over!
The gun was bought brand new. How could it misfire?
- Whose side are you on? - Yours of course, General.
Remember...
... a clever dog is still a dog.
I'll remember it.
Mitea-san, I'm sorry that I killed your man.
Don't worry, there are many directors around.
We'll hire a new one tomorrow!
Careful, it's hot!
- General, Mr. Chang is here - Please.
Sit.
Your trick didn't work.
I don't think true love exists in this world.
Have you ever seen the wind, General?
Never seeing it doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
Clever.
Do you want me to flatter you or be frank with you?
Flatterers are a dime a dozen. Of course I want the truth.
If I say something wrong, will you shoot me?
Are you testing me?
Let me tell you, a great stomach is broad enough for ships.
My stomach is broad enough for tanks.
You can try continuing to see whether you can make me mad.
All right, let me ask you...
... do you and Madam 7th love freely?
Can't say a word.
- So the rumours are true. - What rumours?
Rumours say she has a fiancé.
But you have locked her up using your influence, is it true?
Maybe...
That explains it.
She hates you, how could she be nice to you?
That's why I never forced her.
No matter how much I want it, I don't use force.
Really?
Not even a kiss.
You see what I mean?
General is a true gentleman.
Of course!
I'm much better than her fiancé!
That man is fat and short, old and ugly...
... a whoring gambler, and even curses all the time.
- Surely not? - It's true.
I admit I'm at fault.
But he's even worse.
Yin loved him, yet he ran off to Europe.
Vanished without a trace.
Isn't he such a jerk?
I'm not talking about you. Why do you look so glum?
I didn't sleep well last night.
I heard that her fiancé isn't that bad.
You say?
My blood boils at the mention of him.
Weren't you were talking about "free love" just now?
How exactly does one love freely?
Firstly, give her freedom.
Let her go?
No, I can't!
Just teach me how to make her love me without setting her free.
In that case, trick her to fall in love with you.
Even so, it takes practice and hard work to deceive someone.
General has a good memory. Good, there's another trick.
Pay attention.
- What is this trick called? - "Look for Love."
Amazing!
Women love the attention of a man.
Gaze at Liu Yin like that every day...
... preferably with desire and hunger for her...
... then she'll be happy.
That makes sense!
But how did you know she's called Liu Yan?
- You just said it. - I said it?
- Did I? - Yes...
Did he?
Children don't lie.
I have an idea, General.
Invite me to perform more for Madam 7th at your residence.
Let me befriend her...
... and figure out what she really wants.
Good idea... good idea.
- Let's make it tonight! - Okay.
Turn this way, right?
Remember to relax your muscles or you'll hurt your neck.
Hurt the neck?
Is it dangerous? Will it break my neck?
Rhythm is the key...
Yin, Master Chang just taught me a new trick.
Let me perform it for you!
- Take a seat. - Okay.
- Let me help you. - Okay, thanks.
- My neck... it's breaking! - Enough, Chang Hsien!
- Be careful, General. - I'm fine, I'm fine.
Yin, you finally cared about me. I'm so touched.
Come and drink with us tonight. Let's be happy together.
Let's play!
- Eeny meeny! - Miny moe!
- Catch the tiger! - By the toe!
- If it hollers! - Let it go!
You're good!
Okay, I'll drink.
Help yourself.
The General may have lots of friends...
... but few are invited to drink with him.
Looks like Master Chang has become your close friend.
- I wish I'd met him earlier. - What do you two talk about?
Besides life and philosophy...
... we even talk about relationships.
He not only knows everything about magic, but even love.
Was it rewarding discussions?
Yes, we exchanged views on "free love".
But I wasn't totally convinced.
- Can General elaborate? - Of course.
You must know traditionally, marriage was arranged by parents.
Many couples have grown old together.
It's wrong.
The man usually gets to choose, but the woman is passive.
Do you know many women wait until their husband's death...
... before they can resume their freedom?
- Really? - Yes!
So the arranged marriage you talked about...
... doesn't entail happiness. Right?
But "free love" does has its downside.
Too much freedom...
... and you may love the wrong person.
Right, right, just like you.
You chose your fiancé.
Was it the right choice?
He still ran away in the end.
But I can be certain...
... if one side is unwilling, it won't end well.
I can also be certain...
... even if both sides are willing, it may not end well.
Since both of you appear to have strong opinions...
... why don't I ask you two some questions?
Master Chang, how many types of love are there?
There is sympathetic love...
... gratitude love...
... companionship love...
... but none can compare to the eternal power of a first love.
What is love then?
Love is tricky indeed.
It can't be calculated like arithmetic...
... nor quantified like physics.
It's mystical indeed.
There is love borne out of fantasy but unrealistic.
Some are borne out of desire but unattainable.
Like a jinx.
That's why you must remain sober, General.
But I can't help it!
Last question.
If your mother and I fall into the sea, who do you save?
Why would you fall into the sea with his mother?
Even so, it should be with my mother.
Fine, your mother and I.
Who would you save?
My mother can swim. She doesn't need me to save her.
- Can your mother swim? - She's a great swimmer!
We're not discussing whose mother can swim now...
... but who would you save?
- Save you. - Save you.
Why don't you save your mother?
I already said she's a great swimmer.
Don't go.
- Stay a little longer. - Madam 7th...
... a lamp must be lit to shed light. Words must be said to be understood.
Since we have such an interesting subject in common today...
... why don't you untie the knot in your heart?
That's right, let's untie all the knots once and for all.
Do you still love your fiancé?
Or maybe you've fallen in love with the General?
How hard is it to say you love me? It's hard on me.
I know why she is hesitant towards you, General.
It's because you can't control your emotions.
If you can't have love, you steal it.
If you can't suppress the rebels, you put them in jail.
Don't talk nonsense in front of Yin.
- You didn't kill them? - No, I didn't! I just locked them up.
Who would believe you? Would you?
No wonder they call you the rotten warlord.
There are two things I hate the most in life.
One is being called illiterate.
Two is being called the rotten warlord.
Don't challenge me.
See, you can't control your temper.
You must prove it to us.
I'm warning you, stop it now.
I knew you're narrow-hearted and can't accept the truth.
Kill me. Drag me out and have me shot.
- Men! - Yes!
- Take him away! - Yes!
Madam 7th, don't go!
The twins aren't on my side. I'm sorry.
I understand.
Many in this prison aren't my people.
Mind your words.
Warden, did you improve the food?
Yes, right after you gave the order, General!
There's fish and meat for every meal now.
Wu and Fan...
I even thought they were foreigners.
"Democracy" is science. "Science" is democracy.
Did I remembered correctly?
It's the other way round!
Do you really take me for a fool?
Let me tell you, to accomplish a goal, one must gather strength.
Today, I ask the Japanese for tanks.
Tomorrow, for airplanes and cannon.
Once I'm strong enough, I'll kick them out!
By then, I'm the boss.
I'm afraid if they stage a demonstration...
... they'll be caught and killed.
Don't believe the rumours.
Sometimes, you can't even trust your own eyes.
Just like my magic.
I'll show you around.
Is the army camp ahead?
Yes!
It's restricted grounds. Wait for me here.
All follow me!
But, General...
I said follow me!
Go...
Master.
Are you okay?
Brat, you've finally come?
Found the Cold Fire yet?
What happened?
I was touring with Yin and the troupe that day.
Liu Kun-shan captured us.
He wants the 7 Wonders scroll. I refused and he had me beaten.
What is this 7 Wonders?
It's like the Cold Fire.
A combination of 7 elements used to control the mind.
Humans are vulnerable.
When they're lost, they seek help from spirits.
Corrupt men use their skills to deceive people.
In our line, there are many becoming swindlers.
Liu was my pupil when he was around the age of ten.
Even earlier than you.
He was smart but obsessed with illusions.
Soon, he started to swindle people.
I threw him out.
A swindler who ended up fooling himself.
It's really pathetic.
The truth depends on your perspective.
If people watch us from behind the stage, good acts can look fake.
Looks like Bully Lei wasn't responsible for this.
Yin asked him to help me. That's why I'm still alive
Once I'm certain Yin is safe, I'll get you out of here.
No rush.
Don't alarm our foe now.
Liu is so desperate for the 7 Wonders...
... he must be having a major agenda.
Use his weakness.
Remember, magic is based on the art of deception.
The secret is in the box.
There are two kinds of audiences in the world.
Some want the truth...
... others revel in the illusion.
- Which one are you? - Illusion is a kind of pleasure.
Why must it be ruined?
Yes, truth can often be absurd.
Even cruel and ugly.
It's better to leave room for imagination.
But it's the lies that hurt.
Looks like you already guessed who I am.
I believe all magicians are good at keeping secrets.
Can you help me find the truth?
- Please. - Greetings, Commander Liu.
Greetings, everyone.
When can we finally get to wear our Manchurian robes in public?
Don't worry, 2nd Brother. That day will come soon.
Your Highness. Your Highness.
This is Taga Group's President, Mr. Mitearai.
I'm honoured to work with Your Highness.
Wonderful!
Thank you!
Gentlemen, any requests to the mighty spirits?
We long to restore our reign.
Will the outcome be victorious?
Victory will be determined by a single battle.
The sign is favorable.
When to take action?
Seize the chance. Do not delay.
Great!
Your Majesty...
... how I miss you!
We have a new magic show!
Come see the show!
Boss, Butler Liu.
- I've found it. - It was right under our noses!
Master Chang Performs The Golden Touch From The 7 Wonders
The Scroll Of The 7 Wonders
Come back!
Who are you? You dare to steal my scroll?
- Give it to me! - Go!
Catch!
Still running?
Thief, I've put a curse on you. You'll see by midnight!
What was in the bowl?
Don't touch it or you will never get married.
I've already touched it.
Wash your hands with vinegar, not water.
"The Golden Touch."
"5 Demon Traps."
"Invisible Walker."
"Magic Labyrinth."
"Moving Mountains and Sea."
"Almighty Fire."
"Magic Bean Army."
I've found it...
... I've finally found it!
He knows sorcery.
He really knows sorcery!
Welcome our honoured guest!
Boss, this way, slowly.
Master Chang, I'm glad that you've come.
Madam Hua, he is Peking's greatest magician.
Serve him well!
If you really wish to talk, don't let these people bother us.
Well, leave us alone.
Master Chang, you're quite a ladies' man.
Save the nonsense. Give me back the scroll.
I'm only borrowing it for a look. I'll return it once I'm done.
Without my guidance, it's useless even if you look.
What are you saying? What's your relationship with Liu Wan-yao?
He's my master.
Just as I thought.
I'm not finished yet!
If you smile again...
... I'll make your face...
... larger than this fist!
- He's a rogue pupil of my master. - He's a traitor too?
Stop beating around the bush. What do you want?
I want to learn the 7 Wonders.
I only teach my pupils.
You don't even need to think about it.
I'll take you as my master.
No need to knee, just pay me.
I'll pay any price. Please sit.
Good. But to accept you as my pupil...
... we have to check our karmic connection.
How do we find out?
What's your zodiac?
Dog.
Wrong.
You're a turtle.
You never leave your shell behind, you dare say you're not a turtle?
Can I borrow it?
Here.
Joining forces can break metal.
Looks like we're fated to be master and pupil.
Master.
We can even shake the world together.
You're conspiring with the Japanese behind Lei?
- How do you know? - Your turtle shell is useless.
If it were mine, I can even predict the day for taking action.
I can help you, but on one condition.
Tell me, Master.
I want to be the Imperial Adviser after the dynasty is restored.
You're one of us too?
My orginal name is...
... Gesaerdu Duoduoshan.
I suppose we're on the same side.
Yes...
I'll definitely recommend you, my Master.
Also, you must have figured out my other motive in approaching Bully Lei.
He killed my father on the battlefield and I want revenge.
I want to personally kill that bastard as well.
- When will you teach me? - No rush.
You need to fast for 49 days first and must not kill.
Wait for a moonless night with northwesterly winds...
... and your powers will be heightened.
I'll do as you say, Master.
You're really too important to me.
From tomorrow, I'll send people to protect you day and night...
... so that Lei can't capture you.
Don't you trust me?
I just want you to be safe.
Fine!
- Let's have a toast. - Okay, bring the wine!
What are you doing?
Leave now or it'll be too late!
Leave me alone!
- Let me go! - Listen to me!
Let me go!
Mr. Chang, Li Yi went to rescue his comrades.
You two should leave now.
Mr. Chang, come with us.
In that case, we must leave.
Let's go!
Visit when you're free.
I will.
Sure. Let's go!
How about you all?
The show must go on.
Right?
That's right.
Remember...
... the best magic trick will still fail.
Don't panic when it happens. You must improvised.
Just continue.
From now on, I'm relying on you all.
Madam 7th, the General is here.
- All of you, get out. - Yes.
Yin, did you know?
Chang Hsien planned to kidnap me!
What does he really want?
Even Butler Liu is behaving strangely.
He suddenly addressed Chang Hsien as master.
He should respect his master then.
Why is he spying on his own master?
What the hell is going on?
I don't understand it It's driving me crazy!
Chang Hsien is my fiancé.
He did everything for me.
Can you tell Butler Liu not to hurt him?
If you save him...
... then I'm yours.
You want a baby, don't you?
What's the point of having a baby...
... when his mother doesn't love me?
On the night of the party...
... from the way you gazed at him, I'd already guessed...
... if only you would look at me the same way...
... I'd be satisfied for life.
I've pretended to be a fool my whole life.
I never thought I'd be so convincing...
... that I'd fooled all the people by my side.
Someone who plays a fool to please you..
... can't be a bad person, right?
Bully...
... if you think I've misunderstood you...
... I can say I'm sorry.
But you have no right to say I'm wrong...
... because I didn't cause any of this.
Fine!
Will you kill him?
Chang Hsien!
Come out now!
Where are you?
What's the fuss?
You heartless man!
This punch is for Yin!
She's the best woman I've ever met.
You treat her this way?
You stole my woman.
You still have the cheek to tell me?
Why didn't you tell me earlier?
What makes you think I'll kill you?
How do you know I won't set you two free?
Do you really mean it?
What did I say?
You just said...
... you said if I'd come clean with you...
... not only will you not kill us, you would even let us go.
Go to hell.
Stop playing around with words.
Are you giving her back to me?
Absolutely no!
Go to hell!
Stop fighting.
What did you find out?
Butler Liu conspired with the Japanese to restore Qing dynasty.
All those filmmakers are spies.
Once they succeed, they'll kill you immediately.
He doesn't have the nerve...
Do you know he hids something under his hat?
Under the hat?
I must really find out what it is!
Help!
I'll kill you!
Don't run!
General.
Aren't you suppose to be on the film set today?
You castrate!
I always thought you were just a homeless street-performer eunuch.
I pitied you and made you a soldier...
... yet you made me a cuckold?
I can still understand you for keeping your pigtail.
But how can you justify that "thing" in your pants!
If I don't kill you today...
... I'm not Bully Lei!
Don't shoot! Don't shoot!
Please, don't kill him.
We were childhood lovers and fellow street-performers.
I sang and he performed magic acts.
We planned to get married when the time is right.
But the war separated us.
When I found him, he was already in your army...
... and I was already your wife.
I didn't dare tell you the truth.
Do us a favor...
... kill us both.
Take your man and leave.
- Kill him! - If I ever see him again...
- Kill him! - ... I'll castrate him myself!
Get out!
You let him go?
He's already gone. Can it be fake?
You're really letting him off?
Chang Hsien...
... I never imagined you were so cold-blooded.
Didn't you heard?
They were childhood lovers separated by war.
Compare to you and Yin, isn't their plight...
... more heartbreaking and worthy of sympathy?
You're suggesting that man is kind by nature.
He won't repay your kindness with malice.
He won't conspire against you...
... and that he'll stop restoring the Qing dynasty.
Is that so?
Remorse?
A little.
- Send people after him now! - No problem.
I'll raid Mitearai tonight with the other generals...
- ... and then... - Tonight? Take action now!
My friends enjoy the nightlife. I bet they're still sleeping now.
Come.
- To the bathhouse again? - Good idea!
Tonight's going to be a long night.
Let's go.
I'll bring you to the newest and biggest bathhouse in Peking!
Hey, why don't you call your friends first...
... and tell them to prepare?
No hurry. Get a bath first.
Taga Samurais...
... Butler Liu has been exposed.
It's time for us to take charge!
Bully Lei has already uncovered our plan.
The future of our empire is at stake!
We can't wait anymore!
Take action now!
- Kill Bully Lei! - Long live the empire!
Madam 7th!
Yin!
Let's go!
- Don't move! - Don't move!
Get me General Kao.
Found him yet?
Nobody is answering.
Could they have all gone to the brothel?
General, Butler Liu has staged a coup!
He's holding many officers' families hostage and wants them to revolt!
Here they come.
Kill!
Take these!
Tangerine, Peach, Apricot, Melon Seed!
Lotus Seed, Raisin are all here.
Attack!
Mr. Chang, protect the General! I'll fight with them!
Let's go!
I told you to call first but you'd wanted a bath!
I thought you wanted to go!
Stop arguing! Which side are we going?
- This way! - That way!
Straight ahead!
Be careful!
Bully!
None of our business now.
It's the best time to rescue master.
We can't leave him here!
Yin!
Meet me at the tavern!
Chang Hsien...
- Bully. - Yin, where's Chang Hsien?
He went to the tavern.
Bully Lei, you're dead!
Yin!
What are you doing, Chang Hsien?
Yin, ignore him!
In the end, you still rage with jealousy.
Once you've let a woman down...
... you can't win her back no matter how good the magic.
You can't have doubts about me! Leave with me!
Go with him, let me be!
Chang Hsien...
... I hate you!
Bully!
Be careful!
Bully, get up!
I'm stuck.
I want to see their corpses!
Douse the fire!
Watch out for the grenades!
Long live His Majesty!
Please be seated!
Ladies and gentlemen...
... this century's greatest miracle is upon us.
A divine army will descend and destroy our enemies.
Restoring His Majesty to the throne.
Please welcome our Imperial Adviser.
My men are all over this place.
If Master's magic fails to work...
... I'll offer his head to the mighty spirits to help you.
Guardians of the spiritual worlds...
... rise under my command...
... warriors and horses...
... from the grass and beans.
Come forth!
In the name of heaven and earth...
... I summon thunderbolts and lightnings.
Destroy thy enemy with fire and blaze.
Abracadabra!
Conjure!
Bastard!
Why is he throwing beans at us?
Idiots! This is fake!
This magic show is amazing!
Commander Liu, what's going on?
Didn't you say he was a real sorcerer?
Creating an army by magic? You must be joking!
Something's wrong! Forget it.
Let's go, let's go.
Wait!
I don't know if magic really exists in this world...
... but I know that everyone must hope for miracles.
Just have faith.
Your dreams will come true.
It's a movie!
Director: Chang Hsien
Starring: Bully Lei, Liu Yin
What is it?
Movies are fake.
Don't be fooled!
Don't be serious!
Why are they still alive? How come?
Slowly! Don't break it!
I want to see their corpses!
Douse the fire!
Watch out for the grenades!
Go
Liu Kun-shan...
... let me make your dreams come true.
Baby...
I love you...
Are you hungry?
My dream has finally come true.
Me too.
Where's my dream?
- My dream... - My dream?
The 7 Wonders create only illusions.
Only through hard work can dreams be realized.
I've worked hard all my life!
But you took the wrong path.
Your dreams will end up as nightmares.
Kun-shan...
... the day has come...
... to eradicate all evil!
Kill!
Master!
The show is almost over. Why are you all still fighting?
Just open fire!
♪ Even without wine, life intoxicates us ♪
♪ Love, hate, fame, fortune ♪
♪ Life is like a play ♪
♪ Magicians can make counterfeits as good as real ♪
♪ But they can never alter a woman's heart ♪
♪ I'm not being arrogant, but I know my mother best ♪
♪ One angry look ♪
♪ My father turns white as a ghost ♪
Grandpa, let's go.
Let's go watch the last show.
All right, let's go!
Brother Bully, do you really bear to abandon your troops...
... power and fortune?
Didn't you used to call me a rotten warlord?
Now I have nothing.
What else can you come up with?
I was only joking. Don't be so sensitive.
Where do you two plan to go?
I'm invited to the World Magic Championships in England.
But...
... I still want to go to France.
People can experience many facets of life on stage.
So I want to make films.
I hope there's a future in it.
I'll go to Prussia to do weapon research.
One day, I'll build a flying bomb to kill enemies from distance.
And you?
I'm still undecided.
What time is it? This is no time for jokes.
Yin, just pick me.
Father...
... I finally know why the 7 Wonders did nothing for me.
It's because I have no ambition.
I don't desire either of them.
Why regret the past and worry about the future?
Why neglect the best things in life in order to feed our ambition?
They're just two insensitive, rotten scoundrels.
- She means you. - You!
You don't need me at all.
Better find yourself a nanny.
Go find one.
Goodbye.
No, no need for farewells. We won't meet again.
Father, let's go.
What are you two waiting for?
Girls need to be coaxed.
You have six wives at home. Go back!
I've gotten rid of them. Now it's fair game.
Bullshit!
Yin, here comes your baby, Bully!
- Shut up, you're so annoying! - I love you!
I'm not a beauty if I don't take revenge.
Let's split up and follow them.
Till we meet again!